Driving in circles

To fear God is to have a heart that is sensitive to both His God-ness and His graciousness. It means to experience great awe and a deep joy simultaneously when one begins to understand who God really is and what He has done for us. Therefore the true fear of God is not a fear that makes a person run away and flee from God. It is a fear that drives him to God. Love for God and fear of Him are, therefore, not at all incompatible.

Chandler, Matt; Geiger, Eric; Patterson, Josh (2013-11-26). Creature of the Word: The Jesus-Centered Church (p. 172). B&H Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. 

I love my dad. And I also respected him. I knew that if I crossed certain lines, I would be held accountable.

I trusted him, that even when he punished me or did not give me what I wanted, that he always had my ultimate good at heart.

Mom too. About 20 years before she died, she wrote a letter and put it in with her important papers in a safety deposit box. In the letter she talked about her love for her family, and how she desired to give us everything, even if it meant there was nothing left for her. But also knew that to do so would cripple us, causing an unhealthy dependence on her and dad.

I thank God for my parents.

There are many who drive in circles. Loving God when things are going well, questioning or even deserting him when they don't. But when we trust Him, it is then that we should run to Him. To hug Him because He does not hate us. Ever.

There are philosophers who speak of the problem of evil. That because such a level of evil in this world exists, that it rules out the possibility of a loving God. But to me, that is like saying that down cannot exist, because the height of up is so high.

Evil exists because in order for good to be seen, it must have an opposite. But because of God's mercy, and His power, he can control the level of evil in the universe. Such a delicate position for Him to be in. On the one hand, not wanting us to be swallowed up in evil. On the other, needing us to see the extent of His goodness. Desiring to give us good things without crippling us in the process.

I thank God for my God.